Secret friends and confidante and fantasies

Secrets and mysteries are meant to be solved.. If the CIA can find missing persons normal people can find other people too.. You see I have this ability to track people if i chose to.. You can be in the US or UK or Timbuktu if I am interested I will find a way to find you unless you are living on the moon or Mars. Those people who has help my family as counsellors or shoulder to cry on.. I should thank them.. Because of them I have a happy life.. and I hope the same things happen to them.. Good things or right things should be given back... If you feel you have done good things by interfering , giving advice married or single then the same thing should happen to you.. I also have many confidante nowadays.. I now look at things at both perspective.. If you cannot beat them, join them.. Besides all good things happen for a reason... We should evolve.. be prettier by the day.. Be wiser by the day.. Be smarter by the day..Lastly , unavoidably sceptic along the way.. Children give you headaches and happiness... i remember last week when Raidi, Zidani and myself was at Fridays waiting for the food and Zidani started showing other people's food and screaming a little.. he can be a brat at times but sometimes he is my angel.. My sweet Zidani.. Raidi is serious one.. always punctual.. remember promises.. Their biological father is different.. He is nice to everybody..To some ladies ..attractive too.. For me I am nice to people who are nice to me.. but I am a loyal friend.. I forgive people but I don't forget.. I mentioned several times my ideal of perception of happiness may not exist.. maybe in fairytales..promises made are meant to be broken.. Marriages also sometimes break..That is why we have rising divorce rate..but living alone can be frightening or sometimes exciting.. Oprah Winfrey gave a lot back to society besides her tough chilhood. One lady during her show in her 30's told the audience that she is complete that no man need to complete her. I have the greatest respect for her.. I mean if I were single I would still have my flings or smoothies.. A friend of mine recall that the minute he was single he had his share of touch and go's.. This entry may be bold for some Malaysians but it is what is happening in this world. The tv series Desperate Housewives gave us an insight that things are not what they use to be back in our mothers' days.. Men cheat.. women cheat too.. men are bad but women are just notty..

I have many regrets.. but hey Mafiz told me the other day some women are just waiting to become mothers due to their biological clock... (your good friend ka?)

Nowadays I am more cynical but a little bit laid back.. You never know when you are going to die.. Lets face it - my kidney- not functioning fully-- so I need to remember god and also embrace my life..

I look at the Amazing Race Asia and i was amazed at the Philipines contestants- two macho male in the 30's very good looking and athletic- they are at their prime and admitted that they are flirty males and very happy.. Hey i am happy for them too..whoops hubby- I know you have your fantasies too.. the thai....... the ones Ibdillah downloaded for you.. hahaha

So, I may be the minority species of women who do a lot of fantasizing in her 30's and married. Maybe this part comes from my late father.

Sexy women have smell- some male told me so..I believe its true.. men can smell you from a distance.

Men love sexy ladies- no matter how decent they want their ladies to dress.... they have this motto.. she is not my wife.. you are my wife so dress more decent. Only a handful of men who likes to show off their ladies.

So how do we balance? Somehow we are westernised through MTV hot vidoes bootilicious and boobylicious.. If I look at those women and feel a little bit arouse men must be more than me..

hahaha. religion and faith is also a key here before our civilisation goes back to planet of the ape era.

I told my hubby if I ever need to remarry it must be a sheikh to maintain or upgrade my lifestyle..Mafiz said good luck to him.. He is right..I have my tempers and my own expertise too....

well nobody is perfect..Allah made us equal.. the difference is our state of iman and what we do with our life..For a hurtful wife, a lady once told her that to blame god to give such a husband and that she will not make the same mistakes.. The hurtful wife told her that May Allah grant you such wishes that you are so confident when one day you are married and we will see..suddenly her words stumble... she admitted that is why she is still not married.. So Goh we should learn from this tragedy.. Your life is not so bad..

We all plan for the better.. who plan for the worst? I believe I am a brave person.. honest.. I don't try to please people unnecessarily.. we are what we chose to be.. It is a matter of time when those people who had done me wrong in arrogance will face the same cycle.. time will tell.. I can wait all eternity.. revengeful- maybe.. but I let God handle..Life is ironic.. What comes from god is inevitable..often come with the feeling of regret and remorse..

We can be hypocrites all our life.. but when we sleep we don't sleep well.. we have nightmares..talk in our sleep.. we feel cautious all the time..

Next rule, we are not young forever. One day we become old or die.. So make full use of it. It doesn't mean if you have a Masters from Cambridge.. Or your friend is the top student.. that person is better than us.. Remember , Trump is a college drop out.. or that Microsoft owner- with good blue ocean strategy- until the US government had to go on antitrust suit...

Enough for tonite.. Muahsss